I'm sitting here, my paper is due in one hour and a half. I'm doing it and all but I just felt the need to write. Has anyone ever felt so alone in a group of people who are your friends?
I'm second guessing myself, my abilities, my potential. Am I cut out for this? Is this...college thing really for me? I don't know anymore. I feel like I should be out; discovering things, exploring.
I feel as if I should be in a small town in Greece or Spain. Have a simple, laid back job and living out my life. Why do I need this degree? Am I wasting time? I'm dissapointed in myself. I don't know dudes. I was having the time of my life here until today. What brought me down so low?
My paper is due in one hour and a half. Instead of starting it just when I woke up at one o' clock I chose to walk around campus and think of how fucked up my career as a college student is getting. I need to focus.
I want to just leave...go somewhere that I don't have to worry.
Europe is calling me.
Oh, I relapsed by the way.
-Steven
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Steven i know JUST how you feel. I'm already trying to decide if i'm even coming back next year. Since i'm in your place i really don't know any advice to give :-(. I guess it all depends on what you want to see when you look back on your life. Maybe you could get a degree that might support you in case anything happens, but after college just go on and do what you feel your heart wants to do. I've been thinking about living on a commune since middle school (even though my family laughs at me) and now that i'm in college and a lot closer to being completely independent of my parents i'm giving it a lot more thought to it.
-Melissa
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